The mega-producer enticed us back into his gory, gimmicky fold with Season 12 of FX’s anthology series, “Delicate,” starring none other than Kanye West‘s ex, Kim Kardashian, just when we thought we’d broken free from “American Horror Story,” which has been virtually unwatchable for nearly a decade.
In the most recent episode, which revolves around a young woman (Emma Roberts) who might be carrying Satan’s offspring, the “PAW: Patrol” actress and reality TV personality plays a crucial role. However, even Kardashian‘s brilliant casting cannot save this terrible new season, which debuts with a worn-out parody of “Rosemary’s Baby.”
Anna Victoria Alcott, a Hollywood superstar who is having difficulty becoming pregnant, is accompanied by her husband (Matt Czuchry) to yet another reproductive visit shortly after the season premiere of the show takes up.
Of course, things are obviously awry from the start because Anna awakens from her egg retrieval in excruciating pain. “Nothing worth waiting for is ever easy,” a disinterested nurse assures her.) There’s also a weird doctor, some dubious medicines, and a frightening woman who may or may not be Anna’s stalker.
Or, to put it another way, nothing that hasn’t been done before in dozens of other horror films (or, for that matter, “The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn – Part 1,” which gave us an irreparable scar from its gruesome birth scene).
Roberts and Czuchry’s one-note performances are further hampered by the bland script, which doesn’t help that they have all the sparks of a campfire in the middle of a monsoon.
When Kim Kardashian is present, the first episode occasionally picks up. The entrepreneur of shapewear has long been derided by her detractors as shallow and vacuous. But in this case, she deftly adopts the Valley girl demeanor while portraying Siobhan, the anxious publicist for Anna.
She builds word salad out of Waldorf while scathingly dissing everyone from Hilary Swank to the “Everything Everywhere All at Once” filmmakers. (In her dual roles as Anna’s confidante and walking exposition, Siobhan remarks, “You have a peculiar penchant for turning dreams into nightmares.”)
When Anna lands a top late-night booking on “Watch What Happens Live with Andy Cohen,” the vicious one-liners keep pouring, and Siobhan is forced to console her rapidly disintegrating client. “Oh, honey, stop crying. Andy cannot tolerate a swollen face.
There are certainly some cheesy jokes about Tom Sandoval and other “Bravolebrities.” Moreover, it’s possible that Kim Kardashian’s acting abilities are more People’s Choice than Emmy-worthy. She is, however, the only “American Horror Story” graduate to far to live up to the season’s high-camp promise, joining Jessica Lange and Lady Gaga.
